Anytime I would seek a need, I was every word under sun: spoiled, greedy, needy, ungrateful etc. Trying to fulfill need isn't the same as being needy.
Remember the last time you came off and ignored the signs? What happened? You crashed even harder and landed right back on these little peach poisons.
The first time was quite problematic. I knew less about my dissociative tendencies, so allowing that pain in caused my brain to check me out (and full blown panic attacks to occur).